Unravelling the Hidden Wounds of Adoption
The Eight Essential Lessons That Bring the Invisible Into the Light
A journey of awareness, understanding, healing and reconnection—for adoptees and those who walk beside them.
These lessons offer more than insight—they offer a lifeline.
Grounded in lived experience and layered with compassion, this series opens a doorway into the emotional world of adoptees.
Whether you’re walking your own healing path or supporting someone who is, these Eight Essential Lessons will change the way you see adoption… and yourself.
Why These Lessons Matter
Adoptees carry more than a story. They carry invisible wounds, unanswered questions, and emotional echoes that ripple across every phase of life.
From the moment of conception, a baby begins forming an emotional, physical, and psychological connection with their mother. This innate bond, known as the Emotional Umbilical Cord, continues to tug long after physical separation.
The adoptee journey is shaped not just by love or placement, but by separation, silence, survival, and unacknowledged grief and loss. Yet society continues to overlook the lasting emotional, psychological, and even physical impact of adoption.
Many adoptees have instinctively felt what science now confirms. Our experiences in the womb shape us in ways we may not fully remember, but our bodies, emotions, and subconscious never forget.
Modern research supports this truth. From Nancy Verrier’s The Primal Wound to groundbreaking studies in epigenetics, pre-verbal trauma, limbic resonance, and attachment theory, we now have a deeper understanding of how early separation impacts brain development, stress responses, self-worth, emotional regulation, and relationships across our lifespan.
These early disruptions also affect an adoptee’s developing nervous system, often locking them into lifelong survival responses such as hypervigilance, dissociation, people-pleasing, or emotional withdrawal. These are adaptive behaviours rooted in a primal need for safety and connection; a need that, in the earliest stages of life, can only be met through consistent presence and attunement from the mother they bonded with in utero.
In the absence of ongoing presence and attunement from their biological mother, the mirroring required to form a stable sense of self can be disrupted, leaving adoptees to grapple with questions like, Who am I, really? and Where do I belong?
The Eight Essential Lessons were co-created by Karen Chaston and Kim Rankin, a biological mother and the daughter she relinquished in 1973. Their journey; spanning decades of distance, reunion, misunderstanding, and ultimately, profound healing, has given rise to a body of work grounded in both lived experience and deep emotional insight.
Together, they offer a raw, compassionate, and research-informed roadmap through the emotional landscape of conception, birth, separation, adoption, reunion, and what lies beyond that first meeting: co-creating a deep and loving bond.
These lessons matter because they:
• Shine a light on what has long remained unspoken
• Give voice to the inner world of adoptees
• Provide insights that educate, shift perspectives, and build deeper understanding
• Offer tools that create real emotional transformation: individually and within families
• Create space for healing for adoptees, biological parents, adoptive parents, and all who have an adoptee in their life
Whether you are navigating your own adoption story or supporting someone who is, these lessons will deepen your awareness and help you truly understand the emotional fingerprint of an adoptee.
What’s Inside
The Eight Essential Lessons
Each of the Eight Essential Lessons is a powerful, immersive exploration into a key life phase of the adoptee journey. Far more than just videos, these are emotionally resonant teaching tools drawn from lived experience, underpinned by research, and designed to spark awareness, healing, and transformation.
Each lesson runs approximately 160 minutes and shares around 30 to 35 core insights, offering a deep, reflective experience for adoptees and those who walk beside them.
Here’s a glimpse at what you’ll discover:
Explore how the emotional environment of the womb and the severing of the Emotional Umbilical Cord shape an adoptee’s earliest imprints of safety, connection, and loss.
119 minutes | 38 insights
Understand how early attachment, trust, and emotional safety are formed; or fractured, during a time when adoptees are learning how the world responds to their needs.
172 minutes | 30 insights
Discover how identity, self-worth, and belonging evolve as a middle childhood adoptee begins to engage with school, friendships, and the world beyond their family.
133 minutes | 22 insights
Unpack the complexity of teenage adoptees, where their inner world collides with external expectations, triggering deep questions of identity, loyalty, and independence.
154 minutes | 33 insights
Explore how early adoption wounds echo into adult life, influencing relationships, career choices, and the search for meaning and connection.
240 minutes | 34 insights
Parenthood explores how becoming a parent brings forward emotions around identity, loss, connection, and the generational impact of adoption.
Est 160 minutes | Avg. 31 insights
Delve into the emotional terrain of reunion; from hope, uncertainty, and reconnection to the realities of grief, expectation, and the longing for acceptance.
Est 160 minutes | Avg. 31 insights
Learn how to move beyond the initial reunion and into the intentional, often vulnerable work of co-creating an emotionally honest and loving bond.
Est 160 minutes | Avg. 31 insights
Who The Eight Essential Lessons Are For
The Eight Essential Lessons are for anyone whose life has been touched by adoption: whether directly or through the heart of someone you love.
This program has been carefully designed to support eight key audiences, each with their own unique relationship to the adoptee and emotional role in the adoptee’s journey. Each audience receives tailored guidance, helping them make sense of what often goes unseen, unsaid, and misunderstood.
Here’s who it’s for:
- Adoptees: For those seeking to understand their own emotional responses, patterns, and experiences through a lens of curiosity, self-awareness, understanding, compassion, and validation.
- Biological Mothers: For women who made the heartbreaking decision to relinquish their child; whether by choice, pressure, or lack of support, these Eight Essential Lessons offer insights into the lifelong impact of that separation, and a path toward healing, reconnection, and, where possible, how to co-create a deep and loving bond relationship.
- Biological Fathers: For men who may have been present, absent, unaware, or excluded from the decision; these Eight Essential Lessons offer insights into the lifelong impact of separation, and a path toward healing, reconnection, and, where possible, how to co-create a deep and loving bond relationship.
- Adoptive Parents: For those who have raised, or are raising, an adoptee; these Eight Essential Lessons offer a powerful opportunity to gain a broader perspective and truly understand your child’s emotional and psychological world and longings. With insights into attachment, identity, and the lifelong impact of early separation, this program invites reflection, growth, and a deeper appreciation of your child’s emotional needs, while honouring your own unique journey as an adoptive parent.
- Siblings: For biological or adoptive siblings who may feel confused, curious, or impacted by the presence (or absence) of an adoptee in their family story.
- Partners of Adoptees: For those in intimate relationships with adoptees; helping you understand how early separation, identity wounds, and survival patterns may play out in your connection and relationship.
- Reuniting Families: For extended family members navigating the complex emotions that arise when a reunion occurs; whether it’s filled with joy, uncertainty, resistance, or all of the above.
- Friends of Adoptees: For those who simply care and want to understand. These eight essential lessons, helps friends hold space with understanding empathy, respect, and emotional awareness.
If you’ve ever asked yourself,
“How can I better support the adoptee in my life?”
this is where your resources and understandings begin.
Your Exclusive Preview Inside the Eight Essential Lessons
We understand that stepping into this journey requires trust.
That’s why we’re offering you a special invite to “Your Exclusive preview Inside the Eight Essential Lessons” so you can experience the depth, care, and insights that underpin every moment of this program.
Your preview includes carefully selected video excerpts from each of the Eight Essential Lessons, with durations ranging from 14 to 26 minutes. These previews have been chosen to offer a meaningful taste of the emotional depth, lived experience, and transformational insights woven into the full-length lessons.
This exclusive preview gives you a first-hand glimpse into the emotional world of an adoptee, guided by the lived experience and extensive in-depth research by Karen and Kim.
You’ll discover:
- The tone, depth, and style of the lessons
- A sample of the emotional and psychological insights shared
- The powerful integration of lived experience, in-depth research, and emotional healing insights
- How these lessons may speak to your experience, spark reflection, and offer fresh perspectives that support deeper understanding and healing
Whether you’re ready to dive in or just beginning to explore, this is your first step.
Why This Valuable Resource is Needed Now
Adoption is often spoken about in terms of love, rescue, and happy endings. It focuses on what has been gained, rather than what has been lost.
But beneath the surface lies a far more complex emotional reality. For too long, it has been overlooked, minimised, unvalidated, disenfranchised, and deeply misunderstood.
We now know through lived experience, extensive research, scientific insight, and the courageous voices of adoptees around the world that the impact of adoption is lifelong.
It begins at conception and echoes across relationships, identity, self-worth, and emotional wellbeing.
And yet, society continues to focus on the logistics of adoption, rather than the lasting emotional and psychological experience of those at its heart.
The Eight Essential Lessons offer something that is both unique and long overdue.
This is a compassionate, deeply insightful, and empowering resource that honours the often-unspoken emotional and psychological experiences of the adoptee journey, and provides guidance for deeper understanding, emotional healing, and meaningful reconnection.
This is needed now because:
- Adoptees deserve to be seen, heard, validated, and supported — not silenced, simplified, or dismissed
- Parents (biological and adoptive) need guidance to navigate the emotional landscape with understanding, awareness, empathy, and care
- Families need a new language to speak about what has been hidden, unspoken, or misinterpreted
- Society is ready to reframe adoption — not as a one-time event, but as a lifelong journey
- Healing becomes possible when awareness is raised, emotions are validated, and voices are expressed and heard — allowing reconnection to be chosen with intention
This is the moment to step into a new conversation; one where love and loss, grief and growth, identity and connection can finally coexist.
An Australian National Acknowledgement of Trauma and Loss
On the 21st March 2013, then, Prime Minister Julia Gillard delivered a National Apology for Forced Adoptions on behalf of the Australian government.
Her words acknowledged the lifelong trauma, grief, disconnection, and injustice experienced by mothers, fathers, adoptees, and extended families — a legacy that continues to ripple across generations. These are the very experiences that The Eight Essential Lessons now seek to honour, validate, and help bring into healing.
What People Are Saying About Karen and Kim
The Eight Essential Lessons is the result of a powerful co-creation between Karen Chaston and Kim Rankin.
While the Eight Essential Lessons are newly launched, Karen’s extensive work in emotional wellbeing and personal transformation has already touched hundreds of lives.
Here’s what people have said about working with Karen:
“Karen’s presence is extraordinary. She holds space with such compassion, without judgement or ego. For the first time, I felt safe to connect with my true self.”
— Tracey L. Forde, Independent Business Owner
“Karen’s wisdom helped me move from grief into clarity and peace. Her support and process were life-changing.”
— Anna Ritson, Founder, Simply Divine
“Karen helped me to break down inner barriers and align my life with my true passions. Her guidance was the turning point I needed.”
— Bianca Caruana, BE Designs
“She is an engaging speaker, gifted mentor, and a woman who truly operates from the heart. Her energy is infectious, and her message transformative.”
— Jen Cudmore, Entrepreneur & Success Coach
“Karen has a rare ability to connect on a deep emotional level. She’s helped me grow into a more present, confident, and fulfilled version of myself.”
— Natalie Moutia, Founder, Success Women’s Network
“Karen gave me clarity, focus, and the confidence to pursue my goals while honouring who I truly am. I’m forever grateful.”
— Karalyn Day, Executive Assistant
” Karen has a special way, to really guide you and in helping you. To allow. She allowed me to see things from different perspectives. And to move beyond this pain. And now I am extremely grateful to have met Karen and to start my new path.”
– Daniela Grendene, Business Consultant
“Karen’s mentoring has given me a different perspective on getting everything together to meet my goals and achieve balance in my life. I believe I will see benefits from your guidance for many years to come.”
– Deanna Goesch, Financial Planner
These reflections speak to Karen’s broader work in emotional healing and transformation. As more people engage with The Eight Essential Lessons, we look forward to sharing new reflections from those touched by the combined wisdom and lived experience of both Karen and Kim.
What You’ll Receive When You Invest in Yourself
Eight In-Depth Video Lessons
Each lesson runs between 90 and 240 minutes, guiding you through a specific life phase: from conception to adulthood, reunion, and beyond.
Lessons are released monthly to give you time to watch, absorb, and reflect on each phase before moving to the next.
Monthly 90-Minute Q&A Sessions
Join live, facilitated Q&A sessions every month, held separately for:
- Adoptees
- Biological Parents
- Adoptive Parents
These sessions provide a safe, supported space to ask questions, share insights, and deepen your understanding alongside others walking a similar path.
Over 250 Insights Across All Lessons
Carefully curated to illuminate the emotional patterns and inner experiences adoptees may carry across each life stage: helping you recognise, understand, and respond with compassion.
Lifetime Access to All Lessons
Return to each lesson as often as you need. Healing is not linear, and these resources are available to support you throughout your ongoing journey.
Customised Guidance for Eight Audiences, Delivered Through Five Tailored Workbooks
Whether you’re an adoptee, biological mother, biological father, adoptive parent, sibling, partner, reuniting family member, or friend — you’ll find personalised support designed to speak directly to your experience. These eight unique audiences are thoughtfully grouped into five customised workbooks, helping you relate, respond, and reconnect more consciously, with compassion and clarity.
Exclusive Bonus: Immediate Access to the Preview Videos
Begin your journey right away with five powerful preview excerpts from the first five lessons: offering a meaningful introduction to what’s to come.
Frequently Asked Questions
How are the lessons delivered?
Each lesson is delivered as an in-depth video and released monthly.
This intentional pacing allows you to absorb, reflect, and integrate each phase before moving on to the next.
Can I access the content at my own pace?
Absolutely.
Once each lesson is released, you’ll have lifetime access to revisit it as often as needed.
Healing and understanding take time, and this journey honours that.
Is this program trauma-informed, or could it feel emotionally overwhelming?
Yes — The Eight Essential Lessons are grounded in emotional safety, lived experience, and trauma-informed awareness. This is a space of compassion, not confrontation — where your emotions are welcome, and your journey is honoured.
Some lessons may stir deep feelings, especially if parts of your story haven’t been acknowledged before. This is completely natural. You are always encouraged to take your time, pause when needed, and return when you feel ready.
Monthly Q&A sessions offer a safe space to ask questions, reflect, and feel supported within your own audience group. If additional support is needed, we encourage you to reach out to a trusted therapist, counsellor, or local support group as part of caring for your emotional, mental, and psychological wellbeing.
Are there live sessions included?
Yes. Every month, you’re invited to a 90-minute live Q&A session. These are held separately for:
- Adoptees
- Biological Parents
- Adoptive Parents
These sessions offer a safe and supportive space to ask questions, share insights, and deepen your understanding alongside others who walk a similar path.
Do I need to watch the preview videos before enrolling?
Not at all, but we highly recommend it.
The preview offers a gentle, insightful introduction to the tone, depth, and emotional resonance of the program.
I’m not sure which audience group I fit into. Can I still benefit?
Absolutely.
Whether you're an adoptee, part of the extended family, or someone who loves and supports an adoptee, these lessons will deepen your understanding of the emotional landscape adoption creates.
You’re welcome here.
Is this program only for Australians?
Not at all.
While the program was born from an Australian experience, including a national apology for forced adoption, the emotional insights and lived experiences explored are relevant across cultures and countries.
The lessons speak to adoptees, their biological and adoptive families, their partners, friends, and their communities worldwide.
What is my investment for the Eight Essential Lessons?
The Eight Essential Lessons is a whole-hearted investment in yourself.
It first asks for your most precious resource; your time, to sit with each lesson, absorb its meaning, and honour your pace.
It also calls for your emotional commitment and willingness to reflect deeply, allowing space for healing and transformation to unfold.
There is also a financial investment, which includes eight in-depth video lessons, monthly Q&A sessions, lifetime access, and tailored audience guidance.
Full details will be clearly outlined at the time of purchase. Payment plans may also be available to support accessibility.
Do you offer refunds?
Due to the digital and emotionally sensitive nature of this program, we do not offer refunds once access has been granted.
We encourage you to watch the Your Exclusive Preview Inside the Eight Essential Lessons videos and read through this page carefully before deciding to invest in yourself and your healing journey.
Is my information and participation confidential?
Yes, absolutely.
Your privacy is deeply respected.
Any personal information you provide remains confidential, and all live Q&A sessions are conducted in a space of mutual respect and discretion. Participation is always optional.
What if I start late or fall behind?
There’s no such thing as 'falling behind'.
This journey is designed to unfold at your pace.
Once each lesson is released, it’s yours to access whenever you're ready; whether that’s right away or months later.
Can I watch the lessons with someone else?
While it can be meaningful to share this experience with a partner, sibling, parent, or friend, we strongly encourage each individual to invest in their own healing journey.
Each audience receives unique reflection questions and tailored guidance, designed to meet their specific emotional role in the adoptee’s life. For this reason, it’s best for each person to have their own login to ensure a personalised, fully supported experience.
Family discounts may be available to support accessibility; please reach out if you'd like to explore this option.
Are the Q&A sessions recorded?
To honour the privacy of those who attend live, Q&A sessions are not recorded or shared publicly.
We encourage live attendance, and occasional written summaries may be offered to support those who cannot attend.
Can I speak to someone before purchasing?
Absolutely. If you have a question that hasn’t been answered here, or if you’d like to speak with someone privately before enrolling, you’re welcome to contact us here.
Though before reaching out please watch "Your Exclusive Preview Inside The Eight Essential Lessons, first, as many of your questions maybe answered there.
We’re here to support you in making the most ideal decision that feels right for you.
How are the lessons delivered?
Each lesson is delivered as an in-depth video and released monthly.
This intentional pacing allows you to absorb, reflect, and integrate each phase before moving on to the next.
Can I access the content at my own pace?
Absolutely.
Once each lesson is released, you’ll have lifetime access to revisit it as often as needed.
Healing and understanding take time, and this journey honours that.
Is this program trauma-informed, or could it feel emotionally overwhelming?
Yes — The Eight Essential Lessons are grounded in emotional safety, lived experience, and trauma-informed awareness. This is a space of compassion, not confrontation — where your emotions are welcome, and your journey is honoured.
Some lessons may stir deep feelings, especially if parts of your story haven’t been acknowledged before. This is completely natural. You are always encouraged to take your time, pause when needed, and return when you feel ready.
Monthly Q&A sessions offer a safe space to ask questions, reflect, and feel supported within your own audience group. If additional support is needed, we encourage you to reach out to a trusted therapist, counsellor, or local support group as part of caring for your emotional, mental, and psychological wellbeing.
Are there live sessions included?
Yes. Every month, you’re invited to a 90-minute live Q&A session. These are held separately for:
- Adoptees
- Biological Parents
- Adoptive Parents
These sessions offer a safe and supportive space to ask questions, share insights, and deepen your understanding alongside others who walk a similar path.
Do I need to watch the preview videos before enrolling?
Not at all, but we highly recommend it.
The preview offers a gentle, insightful introduction to the tone, depth, and emotional resonance of the program.
I’m not sure which audience group I fit into. Can I still benefit?
Absolutely.
Whether you're an adoptee, part of the extended family, or someone who loves and supports an adoptee, these lessons will deepen your understanding of the emotional landscape adoption creates.
You’re welcome here.
Is this program only for Australians?
Not at all.
While the program was born from an Australian experience, including a national apology for forced adoption, the emotional insights and lived experiences explored are relevant across cultures and countries.
The lessons speak to adoptees, their biological and adoptive families, their partners, friends, and their communities worldwide.
What is my investment for the Eight Essential Lessons?
The Eight Essential Lessons is a whole-hearted investment in yourself.
It first asks for your most precious resource; your time, to sit with each lesson, absorb its meaning, and honour your pace.
It also calls for your emotional commitment and willingness to reflect deeply, allowing space for healing and transformation to unfold.
There is also a financial investment, which includes eight in-depth video lessons, monthly Q&A sessions, lifetime access, and tailored audience guidance.
Full details will be clearly outlined at the time of purchase. Payment plans may also be available to support accessibility.
Do you offer refunds?
Due to the digital and emotionally sensitive nature of this program, we do not offer refunds once access has been granted.
We encourage you to watch the Your Exclusive Preview Inside the Eight Essential Lessons videos and read through this page carefully before deciding to invest in yourself and your healing journey.
Is my information and participation confidential?
Yes, absolutely.
Your privacy is deeply respected.
Any personal information you provide remains confidential, and all live Q&A sessions are conducted in a space of mutual respect and discretion. Participation is always optional.
What if I start late or fall behind?
There’s no such thing as 'falling behind'.
This journey is designed to unfold at your pace.
Once each lesson is released, it’s yours to access whenever you're ready; whether that’s right away or months later.
Can I watch the lessons with someone else?
While it can be meaningful to share this experience with a partner, sibling, parent, or friend, we strongly encourage each individual to invest in their own healing journey.
Each audience receives unique reflection questions and tailored guidance, designed to meet their specific emotional role in the adoptee’s life. For this reason, it’s best for each person to have their own login to ensure a personalised, fully supported experience.
Family discounts may be available to support accessibility; please reach out if you'd like to explore this option.
Are the Q&A sessions recorded?
To honour the privacy of those who attend live, Q&A sessions are not recorded or shared publicly.
We encourage live attendance, and occasional written summaries may be offered to support those who cannot attend.
Can I speak to someone before purchasing?
Absolutely. If you have a question that hasn’t been answered here, or if you’d like to speak with someone privately before enrolling, you’re welcome to contact us here.
Though before reaching out please watch "Your Exclusive Preview Inside The Eight Essential Lessons, first, as many of your questions maybe answered there.
We’re here to support you in making the most ideal decision that feels right for you.
You’re Invited to Begin Your Journey
Whether you’re an adoptee, a biological or adoptive parent, a sibling, a partner, or someone who walks beside them — the emotional fingerprint of adoption touches you in ways seen and unseen.
The Eight Essential Lessons is not just a program.
It’s a compassionate invitation to explore, reflect, understand, and begin to heal.
This journey asks for your time, your emotional presence, and your commitment to yourself; because reconnection begins from within.
You’ll be held by decades of lived experience, in-depth research, and a structure designed to support your healing, your awareness, and your relationships.
You’ve felt the stirrings.
You’re standing at the edge of something deeper.
Now it’s time to step on your pathway.
Say yes to your healing.
Say yes to understanding.
Say yes to You.
Then choose the right pathway below.
The Five Customised Pathways
Personalised Guidance for Eight Unique Audiences
Everyone touched by adoption carries a different story.
But often, our questions are carried in silence; unsure of how our role fits within the wider narrative.
That’s why, while all participants journey through the same core lessons, we offer five distinct pathways that speak directly to your experience.
Each is supported by a customised workbook and a dedicated Q&A focus, offering you guidance that helps you reflect, respond, and reconnect; through your own lens.
This pathway honours the adoptee’s emotional fingerprint; a lifelong journey of identity, belonging, and healing. It creates space for self-reflection, inner connection, and reclaiming your story with compassion.
Created for mothers who have relinquished a child to adoption;acknowledging the unseen grief, guilt, and the enduring tug of the emotional umbilical cord. It supports reconnection; with yourself, your child, and your truth.
A space for fathers often overlooked in adoption stories. This pathway gently invites reflection on your role and emotions, offering insight, understanding, and the chance to re-engage with your unique part in the adoptee’s journey.
Designed to help adoptive mothers and fathers better understand their child’s emotional world. This pathway offers practical support and deeper insight into building an emotionally aware and connected relationship.
